What's your IQ - Intimacy Quotient?

Intimacy. There are several types of intimacy, but the overall basis of intimacy is simply a strong closeness with someone else; familiarity; or relationship. You should have this type of closeness with your spouse; but you should also have this type of intimacy with God. There are several ways to develop an intimate relationship with your spouse and with God.

Remember the story of Hosea and Gomer in the book of Hosea? Hosea married a promiscious woman named Gomer at the command of God to show an example of God's love for His disobedient people. God wants to have a relationship with you; an intimate relationship with you. Are you going to be like Gomer and continue to be promiscious with other "gods"? Your "god" could be anything such as your job, your home, your car, your children, your spouse, or anything you put more faith, energy, love, and care in more than God. Don't be like Gomer. Come back to God and really serve Him; develop a closeness to Him. Increasing your intimacy level with Christ will build the foundation needed to have a stronger intimacy level in your marriage.

As you begin to build that intimate relationship with God; you should be building an intimate relationship with your spouse. Your spouse is longing for a special closeness with you. He/she wants to know that you are in their corner; that you support them and you will always be there for them.

I can't begin to tell you how close El and I are. I want to be around him all the time and he wants to be close to me. He is an awesome husband and father. This closeness is a result of our spiritual journey. We've always been the best of friends, but the closer we draw to God, the closer we draw to each other. El and I spend every evening together discussing the day's events. We draw closer to each other during pillow talk as we talk about our schedules, watch TV together, and snuggle with one another. We go grocery shopping together and laugh and play in the store. Intimacy is special and should be something that is growing within your marriage and with God. El and I wouldn't have the relationship we have today without a strong relationship with Christ. We pray about everything and we take our burdens to God. We listen to the Holy Spirit and allow Him to guide us. We need Christ! This journey would be null and void without Christ.

Ask yourself these questions to determine your intimacy level?
1. How many hours a day do I spend with Christ (reading the Bible, praying, quiet time, etc)?
2. How many hours a day do I spend with my spouse (talking, listening, sharing, touching, etc)?
3. How transparent am I with my spouse on a scale of 1 - 10 (with 10 being completely transparent and 1 being completely closed off)?
4. How often do you fill your spouse's love tank? (How many days out of the week?)
5. How many days of the week do you pray with your spouse?

Here are mine and El's answers to those questions above.
1.On average, I spend about 3-4 hours a day with Christ. I read a few devotions as soon as I wake up every morning. Then I read or listen to a few scriptures. Next, while I'm getting dressed and on the way to work, I listen to sermons via podcasts. I also listen to sermons while I'm at work via podcasts and on the way home from work. We usually have prayer via conference call several times a week and I will pray or just talk to God throughout the day. Then El and I pray before we go to bed at night. El says he spends about 30 minutes a day with Christ. He usually reads his bible when he gets up first thing in the morning.
2. El and I spend a lot of time talking throughout the day via Yahoo Messenger or text messaging. We also call each other a few times during the day. Then when we get home, we talk about our day some more and share our thoughts and feelings. We always give each other a kiss when we've been apart for any length of time and usually we add a big hug. We keep each other informed on our whereabouts and if we're ever going to be late or if plans change, we call. I feel secure knowing this about El and I'm sure it makes him feel good knowing the same.
3. El and I are very transparent with each other (10)! When we met, we talked about everything and we still do! We are able to be completely naked and unashamed (Gen. 2:25). We have a deep level of intimacy and I'm thankful to God for that.
4. I try to fill El's love tank at least 7 days a week. I make sure to ask, "How is your love tank?" so it won't get empty. El says he does this about 3-4 days week. (I think it's more than that - my love tank is usually full!).
5. We pray together every night before bed and sometimes throughout the day.

Why not increase your IQ today! Knock the walls down and let your spouse know that you are committed to the marriage. Build an intimate relationship with Christ as your foundation and allow Him to take your marriage to new heights.

For fun, you might want to take the intimacy quotient assessment. Feel free to comment with your responses to the questions above or share some ideas about how you are building intimacy in your relationship.