Are you guarding your heart?

Photos courtesy of Keith Jefferson

Lingering eyes. Lustful thoughts. Long conversations with the opposite sex. Loving touches. Are you guarding your heart? Are you protecting your marriage from outside threats? Or are you wide open, allowing anyone to penetrate your heart and make you feel a certain kind of way? Affairs aren't always sexual. They can be emotional as well. In fact, most emotional affairs may be more detrimental because a deep bond has been formed. Affairs also don't just happen over night. They are developed over time. Over talks at work. Over coffee. Over drinks. Over lunch. Over dinner. Over night. Over time. And don't think that you are an exception. Every marriage is susceptible to an outside affair. If you are not guarding your heart and your marriage, it will be quite easy for an outside threat to happen. 

So how do you guard your heart? 

1. Spend time with your spouse. Spend as much time as you can. Dr. Harley from Marriage Builders suggests 15 hours a week. And don't think that you can't spare that kind of time. We make time for what we want. 
2. Pray together. Pray for each other. Pray for the marriage. Prayer works. But most couples do not pray for their marriage or their spouse. Pray that God will protect your marriage from harm and that He will keep temptations away from your marriage. Pray that God will make you both the spouses you need to be for each other. 
3. Be honest. Don't be afraid to tell your spouse what you are thinking or feeling. Make sure you speak the truth in love. If your feelings were hurt, tell your spouse. If you don't want to go to a particular restaurant, tell your spouse. There will be times for compromise; however, you need to be honest with your spouse so you will not build up resentment. 
4. Love them hard. Love your spouse with hugs, kisses, touches, sex, etc. Love them as much as possible to keep temptation away. Hold your spouse's hand. Give them long hugs. Listen when they talk by turning and giving them eye contact. Share your heart with your spouse and not with others of the opposite sex.
5. Go to bed together. Whenever possible, go to bed at the same time, even if one of you is not sleepy, still go to bed. Finish your TV program in the bedroom if it doesn't bother your spouse. But going to bed together keeps you from being tempted to search social media sites looking for someone to talk to. Going to bed together also allows you to spend more time together and build intimacy. 

Guard your heart. Guard your marriage. Enjoy the wife of your youth (Proverbs 5:18 paraphrased).